Fourth time lucky?
04 Jan 2012 2 Comments
in Family, Its How i Feel, life, thoughts Tags: Family, love, mum, relationships, thoughts
So apparently fourth times the charm… After numerous attempts for my mum trying desperately to come home earlier she is finally here…
It has seriously been madness the issues that she’s gone through because whole she was away she did not realize that her passport was expiring! So that when she did finally book her return date (originally meant to be early December) she was told that she would need a new passport and would need to organize it before leaving!
Then there were issues with the fact that she was using a different surname on some of her ID – then she arranged to come back not realizing that all the information had not yet been processed! So forgive me if after three different times I plan to go to the airport (at which with every attempt I am literally bursting at the seams with stress & anxiety) & then literally get a call 2 hours before leaving the house then (the other time) half an hour before leaving the house; if I think that this time I cannot take another day off work I mean seriously – how many times can I use the excuse “I need the day off because I need to pick my mum up from the airport?” before they just look at me & roll their eyes then tell me where to go? maybe this time I’ll let her catch a cab home & just visit her there? In all honesty I did think of telling her that hubby had the day off if she kicked up a stink, but she surprisingly was pretty good about catching a taxi!
Anyway – here I am at her place with the thousands of butterflies in my tummy to keep me company & the knowledge that my mum will criticize what I’m wearing, if I’ve lost or gained weight, if I’m too tanned/too pale & the fact I have nail polish on my toes and she’s not here… Her stuff is here so I know she’s actually come back & the car is still in the garage… And yet she’s out… So I thought I’d chill here for a bit and see what happens in an hour… Push comes to shove I’ll take myself to dinner!
I do hope you’re all well… More info regarding the chronicles of (my) mum to come….
Heading off…
28 Oct 2011 Leave a Comment
in life, marriage, my life, Uncategorized Tags: Family, Holiday, thoughts
As I type this now, I am in the backseat of my father in laws car on the way to the airport with my wonderful husband… We are off to Bali for 10 days of rest, relaxation, mindless nothingness by the pool & hot stone massages!
I am so excited! I know you’re all going to say “but you just came back in April!” yes, BUT that was a whole group of us & this is to celebrate our anniversary!
Woo-hoo!!!!!!!
I’ll see you all when I get back… Stay safe, pray that we’re safe & I’ll chat to you all soon.
xx
Showing Signs of Age: Piercings
25 Aug 2011 4 Comments
in humor, humour, I Really Don't Understand, thoughts Tags: attractive, piercings, Showing Signs of Age
Another thing i don’t understand and i think may be a sign of aging are those piercing ‘young’ people that expands your earlobe so that essentially there is a HUGE hole in their ear…. WHY?
If it satisfies a cultural norm; something expected of you from your remote African tribe than who am i to jude – this is what your tribe does… BUT we are NOT a Zulu tribe – last time i checked it was not part of western culture to have said piercings… but aside from that – they’re hardly bloody attractive! In fact – when i DO see someone with one of those HUGE holes in their ears i have an overwhelming urge to see how good my aim is try and throw something through it!
I once got to chatting to a fool person who had one of these piercings (in both ears with big metal ‘O-Rings’ in them) and had to ask a pertinent questions: “when you eventually want to take out the ring, will your earlobes eventually ‘shrink’ back to size?”
I was essentially told “no”… so does this mean that we are destined to see a WHOLE group of people in nursing homes/retirement villages or on the pension or in the park in 40years to come sitting there watching their grand kids play in the park with their walking stick along side of them AND these huge holes in their earlobes?
Am i the only one who thinks this trend is plain dumb?
Do men find this attractive?
oh la la - what big 'holey' earlobes you have!
Showing Signs of Age: Shorts & Stockings
20 Aug 2011 4 Comments
in humor, humour, I Really Don't Understand, musings Tags: I don't get it - do you?, Showing Signs of Age
Remember when we were school kids we never realised how annoying loud we were when we were in a group – we may not have realised just how “annoying” we were… cue 5 – 1 years later and you’re either mid-way through uni or working full-time when one day; whilst on the train something strikes you… the gaggle of girls chatting about nothing really interesting are SERIOUSLY annoying! And that’s when you ask yourself; have they always been like that and is it only NOW you notice? And if so…. why?
Then over the next couple years you notice more and more; you get annoyed when school kids don’t get up for the aged, people with children or pregnant woman. You start to dislike school holidays… and you start to wonder about certain things you see in store(s).
Which brings me to the reason of this post – i LOVE fashion; i visually devour my Shop magazine each month and LOVE when next stock comes into stores… I love colour and shopping centres and new season items and Sale signs…. but there is something things i don’t get!
I understand the concept of a ‘perennial’ clothing item – I used to work in retail and I “get” that some items can be worn in summer, winter, autumn and spring… but then there are items that are NOT perennials; items that are CLEARLY either winter or summer…. like a bikini – clearly summer right? like stockings are for colder climates – it’s not really something you would wear at the height of summer weather.
PLEASE explain to me the concept of shorts… with stockings?? I do NOT understand how this is meant to be “in” now – how this meets the conceptual requirements of winter attire? HOW? I mean, let’s think about it – shorts are summer attire… stockings are not… my logic is this: if it IS too cold to wear shorts then HERE is a novel idea… wear PANTS! Especially when you see said wearer wearing maddeningly shot shorts + thick stocking + thick jacket/cardigan + umbrella (as its raining)… i don’t care if its in; it does NOT look right – i think perhaps if i must allow the possibility of the shorts and stockings combo it would be with fishnets – only because fishnet stockings aren’t really stockings are they? They don’t actually provide any warmth… but then unless your a burlesque dancer; shorts + fishnets + heels are generally not what one wears out… well; unless your Brittany Spears and you’re off to shoot your new video clip!
Am I the only one who thinks this? is it a sign of my age that I look at this and think – WTF?
Any thoughts?
Anything in the fashion world lately that you’re left thinking – “what the??”
I need to tell you something…
25 May 2011 16 Comments
in Family, Its How i Feel, life, Uncategorized Tags: babies, feelings, love, miscarriage, pregnancy, thoughts
I had intentions to pop photos from the family Bali adventure here last week – but its been a horrendous and thought provoking fortnight to say the least.
before leaving for Bali (like, the DAY before) Mr A and i discovered that i was a few weeks pregnant. We were so happy – seriously; Mr A cannot wait to be a dad! And whilst there was a part of me that was like “oh my GOD – i am now TOTALLY an adult!!” i was gracious and loving the thought that Mr A and i would be bringing a child into this world. we started planning, hoping and loving….
And then when we returned and i went back to work everything started getting back to normal – i hated that i could see that i was beginning to gain weight (read: my skinny leg jeans were beginning to show a slight muffin top!) but that it was not obviously a baby belly (yet); we told the family and friends – we booked our first ultrasound to hear the heartbeat on my birthday – as that was scheduled to be our 12th week….
on the tuesday before my birthday (10 may) at 4.15am Mr A rushed me to hospital… because i was miscarrying.
i had thought about not telling you all – as though none of this had happened at all… but i can’t do it. i am not one for denial – maybe i am built that way because all my mum does IS deny things that upset her… but i am different – i always have been one to look the pain, the sorrow and frustration in the eye and then build from there… that through sorrow comes adversity
it has been the most painful experience i have ever been through in my life – in more ways than one. The bleeding is beyond anything i could have ever imagined… the pain and above all the fear – the fear that i had this beautiful life inside of me that i was falling inlove with, that was a part of me and a part of Mr A – that we had helped to create was leaving me… that everything, every painful millisecond was far, far from my control.
Even as i type this i am humbled by the experience – we were hoping to start a family this year but even we did not anticipate that it would happen so soon… it is said that Allah only gives us the challenges that he knows that we can endure – we will be ok inshallah
i am SO grateful to Mr A – to his parents; his mum came to visit me at the hospital before i went into surgery for my DNC. For Mr A being a star and not leaving my side through each and every moment – i cannot imagine how he felt watching it all… an then taking me home only to have to call an ambulance to get me back to hospital because i had passed out bleeding on the bathroom floor… i am beyond grateful that i have him in my life.
i felt i needed to tell you – that while i have some readers that comment and others that don’t; i feel in some ways that i had some obligation to tell you what’s been happening… so that’s that then…. onward and upward?
The Things That Girls Like!
21 May 2011 Leave a Comment
I know its a really sweeping statement to say that girls like shopping, makeup and clothes… don’t get me wrong – i am not too into sweeping statements (what, moi? politically incorrect?). Well regardless, i have ascertained that A LOT of girls DO like shopping, shoes, makeup and clothes…
Since a lot of my friends do ask my opinion on stuff that i have finally decided to get another blog that it purely gal related stuff – reviews, makeup, clothes etc… you catch my drift!
i had thought about morphing this one but i seriously could not bring myself to bastardise this blog for what i had originally created it for… i sorta feel like you guys know a part of the real me… and that with some of you, i actually know you back!
So, i would seriously love your support on the new little blog that i will be having along with this one… don’t worry – Days of an Arabian Life will still be my primary sounding board… stay tuned people!
Details for the other blog:
thanks peeps!
xx
I Get Things Done!
06 Apr 2011 2 Comments
in Family, humor, humour, life, marriage, reflections, Uncategorized Tags: Bali, Family, Holiday, mother in law, tasks
Its been awhile since I wrote anything – thanks so much Tasneem for bringing to my attention my lack of writing and updating! I don’t think it’s been all because of the “Hiba situation” as for the most part she is certainly out of my mind!
So what else has been happening? Lately I have been engrossed with the “Family Bali Trip” – comprising of roughly 3 weeks in Bali. We are all going from different lengths of time: we all leave together, Adam and I, Tony and Teena (my in-laws), Charles (Mr A’s uncle), his wife Sam and their 2 children + my best friend Susi. Charles, Sam and the 2 as well as Susi are staying for 10 days, once they leave Tony & Teena then stay on an additional 2 nights and then once they leave Mr A and I stay on for an extra 5 days for us to (finally) have our alone time! We are SO excited!
Let me tell you that planning this trip has been an effort in amongst itself! my mother in law is a social butterfly – which is both great and tiring; I am a helper and like to organise things (I think it comes from having to arrange and organise everything for mum in recent years PLUS a knowledge of if I arrange and organise things then at least I know it gets done!) which means that a LOT of running around was done!
When we first thought of this trip as being a group excursion there was a point where it was getting bigger than Ben Hur – Teena and Mr A kept inviting people and family with other people consistently emailing me to find out how much to would cost, changing dates, asking a million questions about the hotel… you catch my drift! At one point the people count was at 14 from numerous other states in Australia…. My poor travel agent deserved a bonus for all the constant changes I was having to arrange!
Not to mention the issue of payments! OMG – do you think all payments were made on time? hell to the no! Do you think that I emailed and SMS’ed everyone saying “next payment is due on XY date” – of course…. Do you think this occurred? No! Ethnics I tell ya – we are on a timetable all of our own – its almost like a due date is purely a guide and definitely flexible! Apart from Susi everyone made payments late – the funniest thing is Susi and I are the youngest (do all the arrangements for both Mr A & I – hehe; aren’t I a good wifey?)! It must be because we both work for government departments that has ensured our timeliness – that or the fact we both come from ethnic backgrounds where we are keenly aware the stereotype is that we are never on time with anything and have thus decided to rebel the stereotypical ethnic mentality!
So FINALLY everything was booked and paid for! I picked up all tickets – Teena then asks me if I have arranged holiday insurance for us all and how are we getting to the airport! Hmm – me thinks my keen organisational skills have rendered everyone else in the family inept to do anything else!
Mr A overheard this discussion along with the ‘list’ of things that Teena has planned to get done whilst in Bali (but that is another story) and decided to intercept:
Mr A: what are you doing mum?
MIL (mother in law): What do you mean? There are just a few things I need to get done while we are away and I just wanted to make sure if everything for the trip was organised…
Mr A: no, that’s not what I mean – I married her already – she’s my support crutch not yours… get your own!
MIL: what are you going on about?
Mr A: my wife does stuff for me – that’s the rule; get dad to do stuff for you! if you tire MY wife out with organising stuff for you who’s going to help me? no one – ask dad; that’s why you married him…
MIL: But tony doesn’t speak Indonesian and he won’t want to come everywhere with me…
Mr A: that’s not my fault… you have to make him… she’s mine… and you can’t have her all the time…
Haha…. Mr A has a thought process all this own!
To My Recent Commentors…
14 Feb 2011 2 Comments
So i read all of the comments sitting in moderation for my last blog post… I read the scathing ones from Hiba along with some of the other long-time blog readers defence to my stance…
And i couldn’t bring myself to approve them!
Not because i don’t think you’re all entitled to your opinions – but rather seeing the copious slings and arrows thrown at one another left me hurt, made me feel battered – made me feel that i’m truly not this hard nosed bitch that goes around attacking people with hurtful hateful words… That in hurting someone else i only really hurt myself. That seeing all the things that everyone wrote saddened me to realise that this is how war and hate starts… and i don’t wanna be a part of that…
Hiba – to you i am sorry i retaliated. Whilst i don’t think an opinion can be formed through the gleaning of one blog post, what most upset and astounded me is that you percieved it was ok to read and comment on my life/views/circumstances AFTER YOU decided to opt out of our frienship (i do believe the words used were either “extract” or “eradicate” -either way, neither are particularly positive in tone!). I sat at lunch with you, listened and treated you with respect. I then walked away on good terms and wished you happiness – and i meant it… And yet whilst you opted out of that friendship; un-friended me on facebook and chose to cut yourself out of my life you thought you had a right to comment on my blog posts, on my thoughts, feelings and opinions? THAT’S what amazed me… That if you’d read more you’d realise that my situation is harder than i had ever told you. My dear; you decided to not have me be a part of your world – the cordial, polite, logical and respectful thing would be for you to also NOT be a part of mine. If paths crossed, so be it – otherwise, please – lets be adults about this!
But i’m digressing… i spoke to my dearest closest friends about this situation – some said i should hurt those who hurt me; that they should get their just deserts. I spent a night having terrible sleep thinking about the “situation” and a weekend of Mr A spoiling me as he felt that there was something wrong and all he wanted was for me to be happy…. I waited till the silence of early morning and realised that for all parties involved this is the best option… The option of a peaceful and respectful “please, lets let bygones be bygones” the world is filled with enough war of words already.
I’m sorry i cannot approve your comments – you all know who you are… I thank you all for your thoughts. To my beautiful best friend and her defence – i love you so much and am grateful i have you in my life!
Words may seem like only words but in reality they long remain after any physical damage may be done… Sometimes they do far, FAR more damage than any fist or gun can…
F
xx
M Day
02 Feb 2011 12 Comments
Tomorrow is M-Day: Mum day… I pick mum up tomrrow from the airport. This time tomorrow i will either be ok or already trying to figure out when i can afford to pay for her next visit over to see family and friends!
*sigh* tis the way i suppose!
I saw my friend anita the other day and she had a very interesting theory that i am GOING to try! Generally my mum tends to SERIOUSLY “somber-ise” me, she renders a one way conversation where i feel glum and do not talk unless spoken to for fear for what could happen. As a result and over time it takes at least a few hours before i am back to my oh so cheerful, happy and smiley self… Mr A hates the sad mood. So Anita theorised that maybe i should try to override the downward mood – be madeningly happy, ignore or bypass negative comments and energy and just shower delerious happiness to have her home….
I am going to give it a go – i mean i seriously have nothing to lose! I am VERY sceptical but hey, lets try it eh? I will take a page out of her book in ignoring and denial!
I’ll let you know how it goes!
Say a prayer, make dua/cross your fingers that all works out better than i could have dreamed… Wouldn’t that be a turn up for the books????
What people are saying: